LA Scoop

By Tequila Mockingbird

I've been trying to find work lately, as you know I act and my pseudo agent calls, knowing I have a nightclub to run the next day to offer me a job playing a prisoner. Don't get me wrong I need the money but when I make a promise, I have a commitment. I said I can't I'm working and besides, you know I hate playing those parts way out in Lancaster at 6 am with no car, and he says, well , I am trying to get you work but Central only wants cute young girls!!� HA, I have been watching TV for my whole life, all 204 channels and it seems they have all types of chicks on the tube.

I get on the horn and make appointments with 16 other casting companies for next week. Note to agents, I can play a black girl really well.

I'm afraid this will be one of my bitchiest columns I have ever written and why not.

It's that time of month and I feel, as a writer, that truth is stranger that fiction. The hills aren't the only thing on fire tonight, kids. My ex friends have been cockblocking me from getting work of late and now I'm shoving the big one back down their throats. A snide remark here and there and I'm gone. I got nothing more to say to you. I move on and you can pretend you know me. I'll probably appear polite because I am. But you know I know who you are. Meanwhile, I have been asked to sing soundtracks for a number of films.

I'm waiting for The Great Buck Howard to come out with me, Mohawk Spike and John Malkovich, We had a nice juicy speaking role and everyone we work with acted like it didn't happen and they didn't see it. They simply were not sitting in the chairs in front of us?. I mean we saw them but they did not see us right there, on the same set, it just never happened even though it happened?. Uggh?

I don't care, I know how to keep busy, I just sang with Jeff Goldblum at ML at Hollywood and Highland and my pal Harry Dean Stanton will be at the MINT.

Nina Hagen asked me to record a Gospel tune with her and I am recording with Gary Allen.

I dumped the poo-poo platter of chicks that were pretending to be my friends and went back to my loner girl mystique.

I sang with Harry the Dog at the 25^th Anniversary of the Cat and Fiddle, which was fun. I love playing with Harry and the boys; Special guest bassist was Eva Gardner, Kim and Paula the creators of the Cat's, daughter whom I wanted to play with since she was 15 and Randy the guitarist who is the object of every girl's affection. I saw every British bloke I've known from the last 25 years minus the ones that are dead, back home, or in A.A. there. God, it was cool. I wore my Swiss Miss mini and gave plenty of titties.

Harry is the Limiest Limey you ever heard, kinda like Ian Dury on steroids and now that he is married and settled down so it's great to hang with him and the Mrs.

John X plays the synth, Jim Henson on bass etc etc etc.

Morrissey kissed me on New Years the last time we played together. MMMMMmmmmm. I wonder if he thought I was a good looking boy? Na he knows me.

Morrissey used to come to all the Harry the Dog gigs 3 years ago, I ran into him at Iggy Pop and he asked about Harry. I told him Harry was Great and is leading a charmed life now. Morrissey just played almost 13 nights in a row at the Palladium so I guess he was kind of knackered. Anyway the Cat was packed. Mike Savage from Pygmy Love Circus was at the door just like old times.

The center of my universe is www.myspace.com/tequilabilly and my work with Odd job aka Alvin Pleasant, better known as Slobbery Jim. All 'nasty people' will be taking a back seat to my work from here on out. I was not getting any work done, hanging out and drinking every day and listening to the same old crap over and over.

I've been listening to Jonesy's Jukebox everyday from noon till 2pm Indie103.1 fm.

He's an alright Geezer. He seems so easy going and loves the same blasted noise I do..

I am an anglophile to say the least so it's nice to here him ramble on.

I can't go to the Sex Pistols because am already committed to my club Club Fluffer on the 25th at 1941 Hyperion. I got the Virginia City Revival filming their video with one of the guys from Jackass directing. Ukeulear winter , Patrick Weiss, Alvin Pleasant, TequilaBilly, Madame Pamita and more. We come back with a new show on the 8^th of November. Ahhhhh, Love to Fluff you Babaay,

I guess Jonesy's all the Pistols I'm going to hear cause I'm a busy girl this month!

Josie Cotton is playing at the Key Club on the 28^th. It's her Video and CD release party. Ginger Coyote and I are going VIP Because we are in Josie's "Maneaters" video. My people used to eat your people remember.

There's so much going on I cannot tell you about till next time. I know I'm going to Criss Angel and Uri Geller and The Magic Castle with my Fairy Godmother Cherie Gillette from the Trimspa commercials and My Tequila TV show on Time Warner and Club Fluffer at the Hyperion Tavern and blah blah blah till next time

Bye Bye, Must get my hair done by Alex at Rehab on Sunset and Cahuenga?.

Write me

www.Tequilatattoo@yahoo.com

www.myspace.com/Tequilaofhollywood

www.myspace.com/TequilaBilly



LA Scoop By Tequila Mockingbird I've been trying to find work lately, as you know I act and my pseudo agent calls, knowing I have a nightclub to run the next day to offer me a job playing a prisoner. Don't get me wrong I need the money but when I make a promise, I have a commitment. I said I can't I'm working and besides, you know I hate playing those parts way out in Lancaster at 6 am with no car, and he says, well , I am trying to get you work but Central only wants cute young girls!!� HA, I have been watching TV for my whole life, all 204 channels and it seems they have all types of chicks on the tube. I get on the horn and make appointments with 16 other casting companies for next week. Note to agents, I can play a black girl really well. I'm afraid this will be one of my bitchiest columns I have ever written and why not. It's that time of month and I feel, as a writer, that truth is stranger that fiction. The hills aren't the only thing on fire tonight, kids. My ex friends have been cockblocking me from getting work of late and now I'm shoving the big one back down their throats. A snide remark here and there and I'm gone. I got nothing more to say to you. I move on and you can pretend you know me. I'll probably appear polite because I am. But you know I know who you are. Meanwhile, I have been asked to sing soundtracks for a number of films. I'm waiting for The Great Buck Howard to come out with me, Mohawk Spike and John Malkovich, We had a nice juicy speaking role and everyone we work with acted like it didn't happen and they didn't see it. They simply were not sitting in the chairs in front of us?. I mean we saw them but they did not see us right there, on the same set, it just never happened even though it happened?. Uggh? I don't care, I know how to keep busy, I just sang with Jeff Goldblum at ML at Hollywood and Highland and my pal Harry Dean Stanton will be at the MINT. Nina Hagen asked me to record a Gospel tune with her and I am recording with Gary Allen. I dumped the poo-poo platter of chicks that were pretending to be my friends and went back to my loner girl mystique. I sang with Harry the Dog at the 25^th Anniversary of the Cat and Fiddle, which was fun. I love playing with Harry and the boys; Special guest bassist was Eva Gardner, Kim and Paula the creators of the Cat's, daughter whom I wanted to play with since she was 15 and Randy the guitarist who is the object of every girl's affection. I saw every British bloke I've known from the last 25 years minus the ones that are dead, back home, or in A.A. there. God, it was cool. I wore my Swiss Miss mini and gave plenty of titties. Harry is the Limiest Limey you ever heard, kinda like Ian Dury on steroids and now that he is married and settled down so it's great to hang with him and the Mrs. John X plays the synth, Jim Henson on bass etc etc etc. Morrissey kissed me on New Years the last time we played together. MMMMMmmmmm. I wonder if he thought I was a good looking boy? Na he knows me. Morrissey used to come to all the Harry the Dog gigs 3 years ago, I ran into him at Iggy Pop and he asked about Harry. I told him Harry was Great and is leading a charmed life now. Morrissey just played almost 13 nights in a row at the Palladium so I guess he was kind of knackered. Anyway the Cat was packed. Mike Savage from Pygmy Love Circus was at the door just like old times. The center of my universe is www.myspace.com/tequilabilly and my work with Odd job aka Alvin Pleasant, better known as Slobbery Jim. All 'nasty people' will be taking a back seat to my work from here on out. I was not getting any work done, hanging out and drinking every day and listening to the same old crap over and over. I've been listening to Jonesy's Jukebox everyday from noon till 2pm Indie103.1 fm. He's an alright Geezer. He seems so easy going and loves the same blasted noise I do.. I am an anglophile to say the least so it's nice to here him ramble on. I can't go to the Sex Pistols because am already committed to my club Club Fluffer on the 25th at 1941 Hyperion. I got the Virginia City Revival filming their video with one of the guys from Jackass directing. Ukeulear winter , Patrick Weiss, Alvin Pleasant, TequilaBilly, Madame Pamita and more. We come back with a new show on the 8^th of November. Ahhhhh, Love to Fluff you Babaay, I guess Jonesy's all the Pistols I'm going to hear cause I'm a busy girl this month! Josie Cotton is playing at the Key Club on the 28^th. It's her Video and CD release party. Ginger Coyote and I are going VIP Because we are in Josie's "Maneaters" video. My people used to eat your people remember. There's so much going on I cannot tell you about till next time. I know I'm going to Criss Angel and Uri Geller and The Magic Castle with my Fairy Godmother Cherie Gillette from the Trimspa commercials and My Tequila TV show on Time Warner and Club Fluffer at the Hyperion Tavern and blah blah blah till next time Bye Bye, Must get my hair done by Alex at Rehab on Sunset and Cahuenga?. Write me www.Tequilatattoo@yahoo.com www.myspace.com/Tequilaofhollywood www.myspace.com/TequilaBilly
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